Dawn's Blog

After 10 long months, my AmeriCorps term is coming to an end. We have one final week to finish up paperwork, clean and pack, and go on a short camping trip. At the end of the week I will be driving home to spend a few days (not nearly long enough) with my family and friends, and then I am off to Beijing! 


Yesterday afternoon our AmeriCorps team went out the high ropes course we have here on campus and did the Dream Catcher. The goal of the Dream Catcher is to climb a 30 foot pole and then jump off and try to catch your "dreams" ( a piece of pvc pipe) that are hanging several feet out from the pole.  It was a lot of fun.

With my departure for China coming ever closer, I've had several people ask me if I am nervous or scared about it. I usually answer with something vague, like, "A little I guess, but not really."  I haven't really spent much time thinking about whether or not I should be nervous about my trip.

On the other hand, I have been thinking a lot about fear in general. A few weeks ago one of my friends was telling me about a friend of hers whose biggest fear in life was that she would not be able to take care of herself, either physically or financially. The thing she was most afraid of was that she would have to rely on someone else to take care of her. I thought about it for a bit, and realized that this was probably not a good fear to have, because there is a pretty good chance that this will happen to her sooner or later  in life, and there probably won't be much she can do about it.

And that got me to thinking about people's fears in general, and what they can tell us about ourselves. So I asked some of my other friends what their biggest fears were. I heard things like, "Marrying the wrong person", "Never figuring out what I'm supposed to do with my life", and "Losing the people I care most about".   I think these are all pretty normal, healthy fears for people (especially us single people without a career plan). They show that we value having love and meaning in our lives.  But it got me to thinking how much our fears can reveal about what is in our hearts.

If someone fears that he/she will lose their independence, then that person must place a high value on independence (duh). And if this is the thing they fear most in the world, then maybe this is the thing they also value most in the world.

So I guess what I'm saying is, if we want to know what things we truly value and are truly our greatest desires (not just what we tell other people when they ask), a good place to look is at our fears. 

What are your fears? Do they line up with what you claim to value most in life? And if they don't, why not?





And what is my greatest fear? Bears. 

Here's some of the stuff I've done in the past month:

Gave Blood

I did this yesterday. It was my first time. I tried once before but they wouldn't let me because my blood pressure was too low. This time I made sure I ate lots of salt and got really stressed out just before going to the blood drive, and apparently this worked. I was a little nervous because I don't enjoy needles (who does, really?) and have had trouble with dizzyness other times they stick stuff into me. I still can't decide if the dizzyness thing is totally psychological or really the result of the stuff they're putting in (or taking out, in this case) of me, or maybe a combination which has classically conditioned me to become faint when a needle penetrates my skin.  Anyway, I got a bit dizzy a couple times, but really not too bad. And I got a free T-shirt.

Climbed a Mountain

Well, maybe not quite as intense as it sounds. More like "walked up a mountain".   I went with a couple friends to Stone Mountain. According to Wikipedia, Stone Mountain is "a quartz monzonite dome monadnock" that stands 825 feet above the surrounding area. Basically it is a huge piece of granite sticking out of the ground. And it has a huge carving of Confederate leaders on it. Anyway, we went up the mountain, saw a 4-D movie, and watched the Lasershow Spectactular.







Watched World Cup Soccer

First I cheered for the US. When they got out, I cheered for Germany. Still cheering for Germany. Go for the Bronze!



Here's some of the stuff I did NOT do in the last month:

Run the Peachtree Roadrace

This is the big race to run down here. Its a 10K. I didn't sign up in time. I got excited when I found out about a friend of a friend who had signed up, couldn't go, and was looking for someone to take her number. I trained hard for a week. Then I found out that the race packet had gotten lost.  No race for me. However, I did go for a run on Peachtree street with my friend Kyle the day of the race, which I think was better anyway.

Get a Tattoo

Nope, didn't do this either.  And I'm not planning on it.